Monday, 27 January 2014


My finger is a little sore typing this as today was not only Monday but Muppet day. Me being the Muppet. I was behind schedule (2 days to be precise) following on from us not being at home on Saturday and Sunday morning. We dropped the kids off to my parents and had a mosey around the shops before heading to my sisters to get changed for Cath's 40th birthday party. It was a great night (more of which later) but as we didn't get back till Sunday afternoon and I was a little tired/hungover the cleaning schedule took a beating. Namely the changing of the bedsheets.

Anyhow, I managed to lose my keys IN the house today. WTF! My worse nightmare - my keys are always kicking around normally in the kitchen but its always a bit of a scramble to find them.  I had the front door unlocked to take receipt of the many parcels that seem to turn up at our door and locked the back door whilst I was cleaning upstairs.  Downstairs was a state - sheets, washing in, washing out, recycling (I work my way down you see) cleaning bucket etc etc. I had 10 minutes to get Buddy and I was frantically searching for my keys. I re-traced my steps but nope and panic set in. I had already imagined keygate before so I exited the building using the patio door keys. The only thing is I can't get out of our garden as the gates are locked - the key to the gate is on the keys that I have lost! The gates are also quite high and have anti-climb paint. You know the black stuff. By the way, we don't have anything really worth stealing its just that extra bit of security living in this manor. Innit.

So, I have to crawl through my neighbours hedge. Yup, thick woody bramble type hedge which managed to tear my finger and my cleaning leggings (thankfully not my Zaggora wear). Having emerged from the thick undergrowth I found myself standing on my elderly neighbours lawn shamelessly waving to her whilst she was eating a bowl of soup.  She was quite startled (naturally) and scurried to the back door assuming, like any sane person, that something major must be up for her neighbour to crawl through her hedge on a Monday.

I think she was just relieved I wasn't escaping a killer of some description and that, in fact, I was just a twat. After all of this, I realised that I actually could have exited via the front door and thus only having to do one hedge (with Buddy) manoeuvre.

I tried to get hold of my friend who is equally capable of such a Monday but no reply. I've now in the lead on the scatty twat standings. To tell or not to tell the husband that was the question. I could potentially get back through the hedge and I would have at least 3 hours to find my keys and he would have been non the wiser. Maybe in a few months our neighbour might have said something about Hedgegate or I may have been rumbled by my own son with something along the lines of "me and mummy went through the hedge today."

Anyhow, I thought I would text and say did he need to come home for any reason? Cue suspicious reply "why do you need something?" I telephoned to say "mmmm, nothing major its just I can't get into the house in the traditional manner but its not a problem if you're busy". Of course, he came home and I narrowly avoided a lecture on key maintenance although I fear this may be stored in the 'you are scatty' archives to be used against me at a later date.

Apart from that, today has been a good day on the weight loss front -1lb. That's all my Christmas weight! Yay - okay its nearly the end of January but its still January and that's good. I managed to more or less stick to my calories 1,700 which is what myfitnesspal tells me to eat but I think that's too much so this week I'm going to try to aim at 1,400/1,500. I did drink and eat the buffet at the party but promptly threw it up at 2 am Sunday morning. I haven't developed bulimia - I had mixed vodka tonic and red wine (3 glasses) that's a lot of drink for me as I'm not a great drinker. Whilst I was lying down I started to get heartburn and my husband was making me laugh - a lot - when that happens it makes me feel sick and that's exactly what I did. Lovely.

The party was a great night and it was nice to be out dancing and drinking. Here are some pics as promised. I think I'm going to up the pressure and put another picture up at the end of February to check on my progress.

Sorry about the stupid expression on my face - I have no idea how to pose and I hate it! 

Slightly better pose - my arms are huge still - legs are better

Arm and bear head alert! Cath looking the picture of health in her lovely phase-eight dress. There were quite a few there that night - a firm favourite with us middle agers!

And remember Nessa? She's lost a stone I think since her last blog post on here - she'll be back soon filling us all in on the details 
In other news, my replacement Wii arrived today so a spot of Wii dance is in order this week as the weather is on the turn. Its getting cold out there!

Until next time...


  1. Ha ha ha ah ha ha! I'm sorry but that made me laugh out loud! I am the queen of getting locked out and we now have spare keys all over the place as my husband got so fed up of having to come and rescue me. Great photo, you look amazing and that is a nice dress!

    1. Hi Nikki - I really need to do the same thing and distribute keys everywhere! Thank you re the dress! x

  2. lol we also have spare keys all over the shop. I have a rep for getting locked out. Gonna be a pain getting them all back to give to the new owners when we move! ha ha

    1. Yup need to do it!! Best you start collecting - not long now! xx

  3. You and Nessa both look great. Congratulations to Nessa on her losing a stone. I'm looking forward to her next blog post.

    1. Thank you Rachel - yes she's doing really well drinking less etc - she'll be updating blog very soon! x