Monday, 4 February 2013

The Person in The Post Office Is..

.......a_______________. Fill in the blank. Now I'm guessing and I could be very, very wrong but its not friendly, helpful or cheery.  Well not in my local at any rate.  There are two post offices within a mile of where I live. Depending on my mood and whether I'm up for a fight or not I have to decide the lesser of the two evils.

Take the other day for instance, there is one lady in the post office that makes it her business to piss you off. Her Post Office manner has a lot to be desired. I don't know if she is consciously going out of her way to be a jobsworth or has a power thing going on but she's doing it. That's enough for me to bang her to rights. I always say that if you are perceived by others in a certain way then you are that way. Given that friends and family also have similar experiences suggests she's got this down to a fine art form. 

So I don't accept her imaginary defence of "I don't mean to be" in fact I'm sure she prides herself  on making the transaction as difficult and complicated as possible. Is it because, in real terms, its not that difficult to post a letter, package or parcel that they've decided to create obstacles just for the fun of it?  Has that little confined area affected their mental state? I don't know. You decide.

A Happy Land Post Office Set - if only! - pic ebay where else

So firstly you have the interrogation when you are sending anything overseas or anywhere on the mainland for that matter. What is it? Papers? Documents or letters? Secret state documents?  What does it matter! I just want to post the bloody thing not divulge the reasons why I'm sending a letter to France. I've already said its not valuable. I just know if I said "I'm not saying" she'd refuse to take it. Its a very similar experience to that of going through passport/baggage control. "Did you pack it yourself?" "Have you left it unattended at anytime?" "Any sharp objects?" I'm going to let her off the interrogation only because I reckon they have to ask this shit now. By the way if it is a bomb with a terrorist note I'm not going to tell you. Just Saying.

I shop on line. I send stuff back. That is what I do. Now the other day I was sending stuff back to Debenhams. They have enclosed a sticky label with bar code so I pop that on the parcel. But then I think hang on a minute I reckon she'll give me grief for this. So I print off their returns label as back up which has the 2nd little paid sign. In any event, I thought I'd try her out with what Debenhams has supplied. I press the package up at the window and say its free returns. Her reply "no its not." I say this is the sticker they have given. It has a bar code.  "Its not free." No explanation. Nothing. Plan B. I have the printout and tell her "I have this." She shrugs. Ha ha got you.

I ask, knowing full well the answer, does she have cellotape. I know she does. There is no way you haven't got cellotape back there. "Sorry, we don't have cellotape." She might as well just say why don't you just fuck off with your return.  My toddler at this moment is playing up and the advantage I had at being first in the queue now means nothing. I have to grapple with him around the newsagents, try and mastermind damage limitation on the queue front AND buy cellotape whilst shouting "that's helpful isn't it." I want to leap frog over the counter, rummage through all their nik naks and produce the offending cellotape and proclaim to the post office weary (aka customers) "HERE IT IS, THEY DO HAVE SOME, THEY DO!" Everyone would cheer and.....I re-queued and another lady served me - one with a slightly only slightly better disposition.

My husband has similar experiences with collecting a parcel - in fact I had his passport and the card but she refused to hand it over. Who else would break into our house take the 'sorry you were out card', nick the passport then trot down to the post office to collect a parcel they have no idea of the contents. 

Now if you are an ebay seller you might as well just walk the stuff to your buyers. You know that very handy thing where you can weigh and pay for the postage, making it easy to just drop the stuff at the hatch, well not at this post office. They want you to get in the queue so they can check you haven't tried to turn them over. 

Maybe all Post Offices are like this the world over. I remember having to post a monopoly board in Budapest (long story) it took about an hour to do. I have yet to send something from a French Post Office (sorry Frenchies but you're not known for great customer service) and don't intend to.

I wonder if it is just my local Post Office and there are many a Happy Land Post Office out there - let me know I'd love to hear your experiences. Until such time I will keep battling away with my packages!


  1. I wouldn't need such a long blank in that first sentence. I find people that own Post Offices so much nicer than people that work in Post Offices. I'm sure they don't get paid a lot, and have to do a lot more than we see, but they do seem to work there for such a long time, so they can't hate their job that much. That just leaves the fact that they are misanthropists and thrive on peoples displeasure. You re not powerless however..just say Guess what, customer survey time, bitch. Flounce out. Follow it up x

    1. I think you've summed it up they thrive on our displeasure and it real terms it should be a nice job helping people to post xmas presents etc. The post office did comment on twitter but I wasn't going to disclose my location on an anon blog! As much as I dislike this woman I would feel guilty if she got the sack! x

  2. As always with your posts, I was nodding away as I was reading. I loathe our main post office. It is filled with women who all think they are god. You queue for hours whilst they all have a bit of a chat and make us wait a little bit longer. Then they do make things as awkward as possible. Added to that they are all as miserable as sin and I often want to tell them to go get another job and do us all a large favour!

    1. Yes that's the ticket they're exactly like that - they're on some kind of power trip with packages what is that about?! x