Wednesday, 27 June 2012

Top Ten Tips

Okay I'm not some dieting expert but I have lost weight and am continuing to do so. I reckon that counts for something. So listen up. Here are my Top Ten 'The 1970's Diet' Tips - Keeping it real people, keeping it real.

1. Ignore the dieting band wagon

Every bugger will be on a diet the moment you start or most certainly during your diet. They generally post their achievements on facebook and the like.  But I guarantee it will then go quiet when they've had a heavy week or two. Take no notice. Continue as you were. By the time you lose all your weight they would have put it all back on again - not once but twice over. The moral of the story is ignore other people on the dieting band wagon. Your weight loss journey is the only one that matters.

2. Being picked up

Ultimately what you weigh does not matter. Now you may struggle with this one as us women are a slave to the scales - digital or manual. No one is ever going to pick you up and say loudly "mmm you feel about 14 stone to me" before passing you on to the next person to see what they estimate. Its never going to happen. Obviously its a good barometer of how large you have become. Most people want to lose weight to look nice - aesthetically being slimmer is keener on the eye and clothes look nicer, you feel confident and all is good with the world.  Although health should be the main driver it isn't. If it were you would never have got fat in the first place.

3. Be selfish

Make time for exercise. You will not find it anywhere. It is essential and proven that your diet will be more successful. It also makes you stop and think "do I really want to eat 200 cals the very same 200 cals I've just busted my ass off for?" The answer is no in case you are unsure.  Do something you enjoy. I love the Wii/X Box Kinect fitness games - its not a chore. I am most happy during and after completing these. It needs to be done 3 x a week.

Don't agree to every coffee/lunch date that comes your way just because someone who couldn't be arsed to see you for ages now wants to catch up. That would be the slim person that wants to catch up by the way. Only meet up if it doesn't interfere with your exercise schedule and weight loss. That also includes a fun night out.

I have three children - one at home and two at school. If I can work out a minimum 3x a week during the day anyone can. The same goes for school holidays.

4. Plan your week.

Look at the week and pencil in the best time you can make time for your exercise and any food danger zones.  Things will always happen during the week that will throw you off course - just re-plan. I have a blackboard in the kitchen detailing our weekly meals. It makes life very easy and harder to just have a blow out. Having said this I do occasionally put a rubbish dinner (rice based) by Saturday which prompts groans and the word "take-away".




5. Banish child talk

This normally stems from slimming clubs. Talk of 'being good this week' 'being bad this week'. You are not 8 years old. You are a grown woman so treat your diet as such. If you've eaten the right things to lose weight then say that. If you've eaten stuff that won't make you lose weight then say that.  The being 'good' and being 'bad' gives an air of 'oohhh you are awful... but you like me". You are not Dick Emery.


6. Buy nice undies

This one is a bit magazine like but is still a good one. A good bra and knicker set preferably matching will make you feel better. Have a clear out of all your clothes. A cluttered cupboard is a cluttered mind. Free yourself of all clutter, make lists and get organised. You need to focus on the cause. 

7. Enjoy the weight you're at.

Even if its 17, 15 stone whatever it is. It could be worse. What if you had an accident you couldn't exercise you were pumped full of steriods? You'd be a lot fatter than you are now. There's someone somewhere who would kill to be your weight whatever you weigh. You're not purporting to be slim so don't be down when you go out. Wear stuff that fits. Don't shoe horn yourself into stuff. The glory days are behind you for the time being - you can't live off past glories. Comfort before denial. Repeat to yourself that you are doing something about it. It will make you feel happier and will lead to success. Remember people are so self absorbed that they won't even be looking at you. They're thinking about themselves and guaranteed if they are slim they are thinking they should lose a few pounds.

8. Do not celebrate/commiserate

After your weekly weigh in by stuffing your face. This will lead to the next day and the next and before you know it that one day binge has screwed up your entire week. Cue victim mode. If you weren't on a diet you wouldn't do it so don't do it whilst on a diet.

9. Beware of the Saboteur

That's the person (normally a slim 'friend' who can afford to eat what they want) who feels threatened by your weight loss. I hate these fuckers. They would force feed you if they could.They're the ones that say "go on, one won't hurt" "are you sure?" "mmm". Recognise. Compute. Wanker.

10. Embrace Hunger

Do not fear The Hunger. Hunger is good. You're meant to be hungry on a diet. Get over it. It means your stomach is shrinking. Worry when you're not hungry between each meal. If you're not you've eaten too much.  Embrace it!

So there you have it. What do you think? Any others you can think of or have I just about covered it?





36 comments:

  1. Covered it well my friend!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. well hello Mrs Roly - and you would know all about it being a very successful slimmer! x

      Delete
  2. Replies
    1. good one. Yep stop taking the easy option. The easy option is why you're fat. Thank you that's no 11 x

      Delete
  3. Agree with everything especially about the Saboteur. If I tell someone I'm watching my weight I do not expect to have cakes pushed at me and even worse when I have lost weight people try to 'fatten me up' Now if I was a recovering alcholic for example people wouldn't try and force vodka down me would they (or would they?!!?!?) so why do it with chocolate. hum

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes that is the one that annoys me the most - peoples insecurities and they're normally slim in any event what does it matter if you lose weight! Or they say "you don't want to lose too much weight" why's that because it will piss you off! x

      Delete
  4. I love this and it is sooooo true! After spending a huge amount at weight watchers, I have now stopped because I seem not to be able to go much further. I have lost 2 stone though but now to try something different. Slimming clubs are all about the cleebrate and commiserate and then they do the hard sell on their products! Excellent blog!! xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. thank you lizzie loo loodles oodles (think that sounds good don't you?!). Yes I always lost about 1 1/2 to 2 stone after having the kids with slimming world. It used to take me about 3 months of gaining 1lb losing 1lb and a big does of reality to stop going. If I had a good weigh in i'd or bad I'd stuff my face as soon as I got out of that place. Prior to joining I'd eat every take away known to man in the week leading up to re-joining. That way your first week is always impressive because you've gorged yourself stupid. The clever thing about themake women believe they can only lose weight with them. Its rubbish - you can do it on your own just being sensible. P.s have you ever seen a full body shot of the woman that founded slimming world? I rest my case x

      Delete
    2. sorry about the typos I get all excited! x

      Delete
    3. I also always wondered what she looks like below the podgy face. A few years ago the face got a bit slimmer for a while but we still only got the face.

      Delete
    4. that could be because she is huge do you think?! Otherwise why not show off your super slimming world figure if it works? x

      Delete
  5. That is very clever madam and all so true! I am a terrible comfort eater and I constantly moan about my weight but actually never do anything about it, I did do the JC diet for two weeks which nearly killed me but it made me aware of where I am going so wrong! These are very inspiring words.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ou est la gare to you missus - I think most women are I've noticed I'm a worry eater especially if the whole house go down sick and I'm sitting up by myself. x

      Delete
  6. Another great post Natasha - and so true.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm going to adopt you Carol. That is all. x

      Delete
    2. and then I'm going to spell your name right!

      Delete
  7. I do fear the hunger, you know I do but I need to get over it! Love your non nonsense style. Mich x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. you do my dear! As bob the trainer says on my Biggest Loser workout "if you're breathing you'll be just fine" - it won't kill you. Just try and enjoy that feeling sounds weird but it means you're losing weight. Thanks Mich means a lot coming from a pro bloggernardo x

      Delete
    2. Bloggernardo - err yeah!

      Had a good couple of days, have the best reason ever to be doing this seriously now. Have until 6th Oct to lose what I can (sensibly).

      I can do this..... Mich x

      Delete
    3. curious what is the best reason in the world ever??!!! Yes you can and am liking that phrase bloggernardo! x

      Delete
  8. I admire you. I decided to stop dieting a long time ago and I have never looked back. Don't get me wrong, I exercise quite a lot and eat sensibly. But it is all about feeling happy and stop worrying about the weight. And since I have stopped worrying, I have actually lost weight. Life is unfair!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi there - Its did take me a long time to figure out that slimming clubs are just a waste of time - its very difficult to break the circle and get out of the mind set that you can ONLY slim with one of these clubs. I want to prove to people you can really do it at home and just eat normally and by eating all the food groups. Well done on your weight loss x

      Delete
  9. All good points - I've been guilty of all of them over the years. I'd like to add a tip. Put a pile of good books, magazines and difficut sudokus next to your bed. When the urge to eat in the evening becomes too much, just go to bed. Btw - I'm really hungry at the moment, yay!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. good one and its also proven that if you can get 8 hours sleep it helps you eat better less crap etc x

      Delete
  10. I read this yesterday and I'm still thinking about it today. The bit that resonated with me the most is how 'slimming clubs' indoctrinate us into thinking we're incompetent fools without them. I am currently one of those fools and although I'm happy with my thinner foolish self, I'm also mildly annoyed that I couldn't just work it out on my own!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Fiona - it took me a long time to stop that merry go round. I always, always without fail re-joined a slimming club (you will always go back and I think that's how clever they are you never ever go back the once. What would the point be in that they don't want you to successful they need the repeat custom) after having kids, putting on weight. And I always would say to my husband "I can only diet at SW" which is rubbish it really is but takes a while for it to sink in. You will lose weight with them but you won't keep it all off and you certainly will be seeing htem in the future unless you just through out all the books and eat 3 x meals a day with 2 healthy snacks and you can eat bread too! x Bread isn't unhealthy.

      Delete
    2. I've found they're ALL about the journey to your goal. Once achieved you're left adrift (to regain and start again!). And, it's so true about being good and bad. It's JUST food! It's not comparable to murder that I over ate a grsakis cake! SW get all biblical and actually call them sins (albeit spelt differently). We're like plump lambs to the slaughter, once you're in you're in. And yet knowing all of this in my rational head, I am terrified to stop because I know without it, I'll surely spiral back to my pre diet self. More fool me.

      Delete
    3. 'Grsakis' - was clearly meant to say 'gram'

      Delete
    4. I'm sure you wouldn't sprial - I was a total SW groupie I can still tell you the 'syn' value of so much stuff! I always seemed to have size 16 leaders preaching too! What's that about. I say if you haven't lost anything in a month then get off the slimming club roundabout and vow never ever to go back. Its so liberating. To be honest I'd rather be fat than join a slimming club now. I don't want my children seeig me go off somewhere to get weighed and then return.I mean who stays for the meetings? x

      Delete
    5. p.s I;m sure they have a profit share with muller light and have you seen the chemicals in them things? I now eat full fat yoghurt for breakfast about 3 tablespoons with fruit! x

      Delete
  11. I loved this. Can't be doing with pussy footing around..does this dress make me look fat 'no, the cakes you ate at 2am when passing through to the loo make you look fat'. I was in SW and left in disgust. The leader was a right porker. All the thin women who were maintaining looked one week away from death and a seriously overweight guy was told it was the 'fruit he was eating that was making him fat' For a lot of people they work, for a lot they don't. Didn't do much for me. As I get older, it piles on. By that I mean, I've always eaten unhealthily but now it's showing. Not around the tummy or thighs but the face is ballooning and I hate it. So I'm taking the matter in hand and just staying off the fat, sugar and processed stuff. I don't have a goal, I'm just pretending the unhealthy stuff doesn't exist. Like a 1970s diet. Someone should really do a blog about it ;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh I remember once in the queue to be weighed a lady said "I don't think I've lost this week I've eaten too much fruit!" yeah fruit normally does it for me! Yes its not rocket science - good luck with the 1970's diet mmmmm maybe there should be a blog like that... xx

      Delete
  12. Some great advice here. I've given myself 12 months to lose a fair few inches and get into some sort of shape. I never weigh myself because I've always been heavy boned and had a large frame so I don't believe weighing myself would be the best way forward. But I will be doing more exercise and eating better.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hello Crystal Jigsaw! I am assuming that is not your real name! I think as long as you get off the slimming club merry go round you'll do just fine. You have to believe you can do it by eating better and exercising. Good luck and welcome to the blog xx

      Delete
  13. Buying new underwear is high on my list. Definitely. Preferably with little need for lots of spanx! ;-)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. ha ha - good luck with that never tried them but I believe they work wonders! x

      Delete