Friday, 24 February 2012

Are you on my wave length?

When can you tell if someones on your wave length?  Mine's decidedly dodgy at the best of times, so I feel very triumphant when I've found someone that is on one similar to mine.  Now I've been meaning to write this post for a little while now. I was going to throw it in with my previous post which concerned the letter 'C' but seeing as I was talking about the Mormons and religion, it didn't seem appropriate and if you can bare with the suspense, you will find out why in a moment.

I figure that the high brow never stick around too long on my blog so they won't be offended.  I'm just going to go for it then. Cocksucker.  Yes you heard right.  I love this word. It makes me chuckle inwardly.  I think it stems from when I used to watch Steve Coogan in Alan Partridge - its that kind of humour. Every now and then, if I'm in a queue at the checkout and someones holding it up, faffing around in their purse with no regard for the people behind them - I imagine charging through, flinging their goods up in the air and shouting "COCKSUCKER!"

I wanted to call this post something along the lines of  "Is there a right time to call your friend a cocksucker?" or "You know you're true friends when the word cocksucker is uttered". You see my problem.  I have opted for the safe "Are you on my wave length" option. I certainly won't be labelling this post with 'cocksucker' even though the hits would go through the roof.  I reason that if someone has typed 'cocksucker' into the search engine then they're not going to stick around and read The 1970's Diet.

Even though I know quite a few people, acquaintances, various mum friends at different stages of my children's lives  - pre-school, ante-natal etc and of course family and older friends. There are very few, I can just text "you cocksucker!" in reply to something quite innocent like "I'm running late". I'm guessing I could only do this with about 7 or 8 people that I know. 

I did this in December to a school mum whom I like.  We had been to a few bits and bobs together, coffee at mine, coffee at hers - a gradual build up. Nothing full on like the Single White Female film. I had an instict we were on the same level but I couldn't be entirely sure. We were at that stage where you're just sussing out whether the same people piss you off!

So she does, in fact, say she's running late. I pondered a few seconds and thought shall I? Shan't I? Will she find this funny? Will she think what the fuck? How disgusting I though she was alright. Thankfully a resounding LOL!! came back.  Phew friendship still in tact.

Now the other day my sister remarked on her facebook status that she had won some money on the horses. Her twin (I have twin sisters to clear up any confusion) put "biatch" and I put "cocksucker". I got the thumbs up like button. They are well aware of my chosen profanity.  My best friend isn't overly enamoured with it, she doesn't quite get my liking of it and normally says "oh charming". However, I can say it and that's the main thing.  Its an occasional treat.

So please don't be offended if I call you a Cocksucker anytime soon it really is a term of endearment from me to you.

On the diet front the food aspect has been very good this week. I didn't have any of my daughter's birthday cake and am managing my no 'C''s rule.  Everytime I think about having a nibble on buddy's cookie the word chemo keeps popping up in my head. By the way my friend's cancer hasn't spread which is great news although she still has to have chemo.

The exercise has been piss poor only one workout this week. This is because I have been working on her birthday cake.  I will try and fit in a Wii dance tomorrow morning but I think that will be it for the week. 

Have a great weekend!

Reason I haven't exercised much!


  1. So many things to comment on! Firstly, so so so so so glad to hear about your friend..well, you know what I mean. Must be such a relief it hasn't spread - I was thinking about her earlier as strange as that is. Big hugs to you both :)
    Secondly, that cake is AMAZING!!! Maybe I should make LO one for her first birthday instead of spending a fortune for someone else to make it...
    Ok, so only two felt like more, I've obviously missed out something..
    Have a lovely weekend!! xx

  2. What a biatch!!! I love it when you say that delightful word! ;) It was when you used to say one of the kids has done "a shit" that I used to flinch! LOL
    The cake is gorgeous, puts mine to shame.
    Re the chemo, I'm building myself up for a short hair cut in the next 2 weeks.
    Thank you to Gillian for her kind comments. I love big hugs.

  3. Thank you Gillian - re the cake don't start making them!! They don't cost less than the nice ones you get in sainsbury's - honestly the stuff I bought came to £25 and that doesn't included the 4 cakes I made plus buttercream. I now have to make little buddy's and there is no end in sight! It is nice to be able to give them what they want and I have got quicker over the years - you have been warned!! @Cath ha ha that made me laugh only said that when they couldn't understand at that age! txx

  4. Lovely lighthearted post, you cocksucker you!

  5. Ha Ha! Love this!

    Reminds me of the famous quote from the film "Sophie's Choice" 1982:

    Sophie: Stingo, you look... you look very nice, you're wearing your cocksucker.
    Stingo: That's my "seersucker."


  6. Love love love this blog and love that word almost as much as Twat.
    Very funny and made me snort tea out of my nose much to the kids amusement.

  7. Ruth you are definitely on my wave lenght first Larry David now Sophie's choice - that's the saddest film I've ever seen really caught me off guard! I don't remember that link x Domestic goddess - yes love twat and you dick too! I'll have to dig some other oldie posts out for you! xx